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Since apparently not many people have johnson on FB, I'm reposting my bday wish I sent there...here! Enjoy.

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HAPPY BIRTHDAY JOHNSONS! This cat gif represents the funky awesomeness you ooze from your pores like millions of bot fly larva, deep beneath your glistening skin, frantically digging and scraping further within your quivering shell of flesh until they reach the nougat that is at the center of all Johnsons, a nougat once sought after like whale oil and likewise hunted to the near-extinction of the Johnson species. You persisted though, like a chunk of sardine between the back teeth of a lockjaw patient, and the world is better for it! : )

  • 4 weeks later...

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